Thursday, June 25, 2009

Whining... in numbers.

38 - Hours I went without talking to a human (the dog doesn't count) until this morning, except via texting. And there were only about 4 of those.

15 - Days until I have to be moved into the new house. Haven't packed a thing.

7 - Days that BF and I have been broken up, and it's not getting any easier.

1 - Day until what would have been our 1 year anniversary. Probably the reason it's not getting easier.

5 - Number of miles between my new house and exBF's house. When I got the house, thought it would be an awesome thing, now it sucks balls. I do not need daily reminders of him as I'm driving home.

1 - Number of empty wine bottles in my trash can, consumed from 6:30 - 9:30 last night.

3 - Number of empty Natural Lite beer cans next to the wine bottle, consumed after the aforementioned wine was gone. (Don't judge on the cheap beer).

10 to 31 - days until I get MP back from her dad's. The first game plan was for him to keep her until July 5th, now he's trying to keep her until July 25th. I really don't think I can hold out that long. I've only seen her for two days since June 3rd, and I'm dying.

Sorry for all the woe-is-me bitching. It's just a really bad time for me right now. I know things will get better, and I've been through worse life experiences than this, but I also know it takes time, and I wish it didn't. I'm just so sick of being sad.

Monday, June 22, 2009


Damn, this sucks. Why does it physically feel like your heart is being crushed?

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Photo post.

So my friend sent me some of her pictures from the river. Too lazy to write a post, so pictures will have to do since I've had a couple of requests for them. :)

Here's me and TM on our first night there. We took the no makeup rule very seriously. (That's BF's best friend behind us, being an ass as usual).

We got ahold of a bottle of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill, and passed it around until it was gone...took us a grand total of about three minutes. We insisted on doing it as a throwback to our high school days. Our 16 year old selves would have been proud.

We had to start the mornings off with flip cup games, to get rid of the hangovers we had from the night before. Hair of the dog, I guess you could say. **Oh, and that's my brother's date (who I got in a fight with), standing next to me. I guess we got over it.**

Someone threw my brother's shirt in the tree, so the girls took it upon ourselves to pull out old cheerleading stunts. On a hill. After we had been drinking. No idea how someone didn't end up hurt.

Here's me and BF at the concert. This was his hungover day, but he managed to almost smile. That's better than he normally does.

Here's my Friday afternoon downward-spiral-inducing keg stand. This is where all the bad stuff started. If only I knew then, I would have never done this!

Friday, June 12, 2009

Get off your soapbox, kid.

So, I'm out for dinner and drinks last night with a friend, and we're sitting out on the patio of the restaurant in the humid Texas air, enjoying our margaritas and nachos. As most of you know, I'm a smoker, and have written a couple of posts about the annoyances of Judgy McJudgerson people. After I finish eating, I light a cigarette (since we're outside in the smoking section) and continue gossiping with my friend, when a lady from the next table comes over and squats next to me. This is the conversation that followed:

Her: "I'm so sorry to bother you, but can I ask you something? It's really embarrassing..."
Me: "Sure, what's up?"
Her: "Well, my daughter's been at day camp all this week, and today they had a discussion about smoking and cancer. She noticed you were smoking and started crying, and she wants to come and talk to you about what she learned today. She's very concerned."
Me: ** crickets chirping **

The lady calls her 6 or 7 year old daughter over, with me sitting there, eyes wide, mouth agape, not believing this is happening...The little girl approaches with tears in her eyes and then I proceed to get lectured about the dangers of smoking. Like I'm not aware.

Child: "Um, so I've been at camp and today we talked about smoking and do you know that smoking will give you black lung?"
Child: "And cancer?"
Child: "And will kill you?"
Child: "And it's gross?"
Me: "I know, baby... thank you for being concerned, that is very sweet. I'd like to quit, but it's kind of hard. You know that ice cream cone you have in your hand? Imagine me taking that away from you and you never getting to have one again. That's what I'd feel if I stopped smoking right now. But I really appreciate your concern."

Maybe it was the margaritas that made me be a bitch to a kid. I really don't care. I get that she was doing a sweet thing, but as a mother, no way in hell would I ever, EVER, allow my child to go lecture another adult on anything they were doing. That is inappropriate and rude. So maybe I should have said something to the mom instead of making this kid picture a life without ice cream, but maybe that will teach the mom to get some manners of her own and not let her child approach strangers and start preaching the benefits of a healthier lifestyle.

The nerve of some people.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

In need of liquid happiness.

After the week I've had, this is what I need:

Yeah, that's me, and that's a keg stand. This week needs to get better, or I'm hitting up the liquor store for a keg to nurse all by myself. It'll probably last until Sunday, which is perfect.

**Something I just noticed when I clicked on the pic to make it larger, which made me smile, is TM's husband checking out my ass as he holds my legs up. TM will find this as funny as I did, which is why she's my best friend...**

Thursday, June 4, 2009

And it just keeps coming. And not in a good way.

These are some things that have transpired in the past 5 days that make me want to crawl in my bed and never come out. Except to answer the door for the pizza man.

1. MP lost three (count 'em, THREE) teeth in a week. I don't normally carry cash at all, I debit everything, so the tooth fairy had to start giving out change. I think the kid's got pliers in her room or something, who loses three freaking teeth in a week!?

2. MP graduated from kindergarten, and on the stage it said "Class of 2021". Which caused me to cry even more than I had when she was singing along with her class, because I realized that I would be 41 when she graduates high school, and that freaked me out.

3. MP went to stay with my parents from yesterday after graduation until next weekend. When she gets back she'll be here for a day before she goes to her dad's for 2-3 weeks. I'm all alone in the house, and miss the little turd already. I threw a pity party for myself last night, but I'll chalk that up to being hormonal. I'll just have to find something to keep me busy. Sassypants has already been warned that I will be at her house more than usual.

4. I loaned a large amount of money to a family member, who promised I would be paid back by Friday. Turns out that's not the case, and I have to wait until the 15th now. Here's the deal I'm most pissed about: there are two weekends between now and the 15th, and I don't have my kiddo. Prime time to go have fun with friends without the stress of finding a sitter. But my account is bad news bears, and that's not feasible I'll be sitting home even more pissed than usual because this time it's not even my fault. Or maybe it is, since I loaned the money...

5. BF was supposed to come over the past three nights but cancelled every night due to some different issue each night. He's supposed to meet me at the house after work today, and if he doesn't I may go to a bar and drink the pennies away in my bank account all by myself. Let's not even start on the last time I've gotten any. That's a whole 'nother story for another day.

6. I totally forgot about a ticket I had gotten in January and went to court for in March. The due date to do defensive driving and obtain my driving record was June 3rd, with no extensions given, no exceptions. I remembered the ticket...yesterday, the day it was due. No way possible to get everything done and to the court by the same day. So now I think I have to go BACK to court, and pay another $225 plus a $25 late fee on it.

7. And the cherry on the whipped cream covered sundae... my landlord emailed me an hour ago telling me that she's going to need to move back into the house by August 1st. I started crying as soon as I got the email. You see, this is the perfect house for me and MP, great school, close to everything, all her friends in the neighborhood, 3 miles from BF, low rent, etc. She rented to me and said she'd probably never move back because she wanted to save money and liked it where she lives. Guess not so much anymore. So now I have to start all over again and find a new place, and move all the shit I've accumulated AGAIN. I'm devastated.

So tonight I've already let BF know that I will be drowning my sorrows with the Keystone Lights (don't judge, I'm poor) and the bottle of wine in my fridge. Hopefully the next week will go smoother.